
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/13300434.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      No_Archive_Warnings_Apply, Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Rape/Non-Con,
      Underage
  Category:
      F/F, F/M, M/M
  Fandom:
      One_Piece
  Relationship:
      Roronoa_Zoro/Vinsmoke_Sanji, Kaya/Usopp_(One_Piece), Nami/Nefertari_Vivi,
      Fushichou_Marco_|_Phoenix_Marco/Portgas_D._Ace
  Character:
      Roronoa_Zoro, Vinsmoke_Sanji, Nami_(One_Piece), Nefertari_Vivi, Portgas
      D._Ace, Monkey_D._Luffy, Usopp_(One_Piece), Fushichou_Marco_|_Phoenix
      Marco, Kaya_(One_Piece), Aka_Ashi_no_Zeff_|_Red-Leg_Zeff, Brook_(One
      Piece), Franky_(One_Piece), OCC
  Additional Tags:
      sanzo_-_Freeform, ZoSan_-_Freeform, others_will_come, AU
  Stats:
      Published: 2018-01-07 Updated: 2018-03-26 Chapters: 10/? Words: 16489
****** Kick my nightmares away ******
by COTZO
Summary
     Ace left Sanji for Marco, and now Sanji is on the verge of going mad.
     His best friend Usop tries to do something but what can he do?
     A text from Zoro? He is back in town? It seems the long nose has a
     plan.
     Sanji and Zoro relationship based AU fic.
***** Memories *****
He couldn’t sleep again. The nightmares were hunting him, they were never
giving him peace and his only escape was not there. He will never be there
again. Sanji curled and started crying. Ace will never help him, will never
kiss him and say that everything will be ok, that they were just nightmares and
they couldn’t hurt him. Ace was … Ace was not there anymore and all he could do
was cry. It was the third month since Ace left him, it was the third month
since he slept just 1 or 2 hours a night and he was slowly but certainly going
insane. But he couldn’t blame Ace, because it was his entire fault, because he
was weak and he didn’t deserve someone so good as Ace, he knew that everything
good in his life was just temporary, but he couldn’t stop loving Ace. The boy
entered his life like a hurricane, with his big smile and his joyfulness and
Sanji wanted to say no, he really tried but after six months of knowing the boy
he just got swept off his feet. It was one of those nights that he couldn’t
sleep and all he could do was bake. It was 3 in the morning and he was already
at his third recipe but it wasn’t helping. His mind kept going aloof, he was
hearing that voice, the voice that was telling him that he wasn’t needed in
this world, that he was useless and he could disappear and no one would miss
him. So he was crying and backing and trying to not do something stupid. He
tried to think at something else. His friends loved him, no? Yes, Usop was his
friend since kindergarten and even though they were now in different cities
they kept in touch. The boy was calling him and telling him the most unheard
lies but he liked that because the boy knew him and tried to make him laugh.
But Usop was head over heels with the beautiful Kaya, and when he will have the
courage to confess to the blond little medicine student he will have no more
time for him because Kaya will surely say yes. And then he will be all alone.
Sanji then dropped on his knees, the knife in his hand falling on the floor
near him. What if … And in that moment the phone called. It was Ace. The boy
was bugging him for six months already and was not taking no for an answer. He
liked Ace but he didn’t want him to be engrossed by him, he didn’t want to
allow another person in his life because certainly he would leave as fast as
the wind. So he wasn’t going to answer the phone, he was going to ignore it
until he heard someone was at his door.
“Come on Sanji I know you are there! I can hear the ringtone you have just for
me ( the snicker in his voice was loud and clear because Sanji had Nightcore –
Feisty just for him ). Open the door.”
Wiping his eyes and trying to putt on an annoying face he opened the door just
a little.
“What do you want at this hour?”
It was a big mistake, Ace sensed that something was wrong, looked at him and
smashed the door open.
“What is wrong?”
Silence … Sanji just closed the door. He was busted and Ace will see the real
him and will be disgusted. He will never want to speak to him, and even though
he tried to keep the boy at arm’s length he didn’t he didn’t dislike his
flirting. But now everything will end. What a shame …
“Sanji? Why were you crying? Why are you in the kitchen at this hour?”
“Why are you here Ace?” The boy asked not wanting to answer.
“I was out in town with my coworkers, having fun and drinking sake until one of
the guys said he is in the mood of wine, a good wine and that was the moment
that I remembered you also like wine and so I ordered the same brand and came
to see if I can wake you up to have a drink with me. And now I really am glad
that I came. What’s wrong Sanji?”
“You shouldn’t have come.”
“Maybe, but here I am now so please don’t make me go away. You can trust me,
you know.” Sanji said nothing but gone to the kitchen and got two glasses.
“I don’t want to talk about it, but you are here and I am sure I won’t be able
to throw you out so let’s not waste the wine you brought. Come with me in the
living room and drink but after we finish you will have to go. That is my
condition, take it or leave it!” Sanji was really trying to be in control so
that the raven hair boy will forget what he saw.
“Ok, I will accept it.!”
So they started drinking and talking about jobs and friends, their common
friend and brother being Luffy, the biggest eater Sanji ever knew. All went
well until Sanji knew he had to get rid of the other boy, he had to get rid of
the flirtatious person in front of him because we won’t be able to resist him
anymore because he was a light drinker and after his third glass he was feeling
gloomy. As if Ace was feeling something in the atmosphere changed he put his
glass on the table and approached Sanji slowly. “Ace what are you …?” but it
was too late. Ace embraced him, slowly taking Sanji’s glass and getting rid of
him also, while getting his other hand in the blonde’s hair, slowly massaging
him. “Sanji! Stop refusing me! I want to have you! I want you to be mine! Will
you accept me?” Ace slowly whispered in his ear. High from his drink and sleep
deprivation all Sanji wanted was let go of his body and mind and let the other
boy take care of everything. He wanted to be loved because he haven’t allowed
anyone to be close to him for such a long time but something kept telling him
not to. The voice in his head was trying to make him feel bad about himself
again, saying that he will be just another bitch for the boy, he will fuck him
then laugh and leave. “No, Ace… “ “Sanji please!” He had to close his eyes
because Ace was very convincing and he felt hot lips on his eyes, his cheeks,
the corners of his mouth. The temptation was too big and all he had to do was
give up. All he need was a little push and it came from Ace whispering in his
ear slowly and sensually “I’ve been wanting you for so long Sanji! You are so
beautiful and you got me all hot just thinking about you! Look at you blonde
with those gorgeous blue eyes, long kissable neck. I love how good you look
with those pretentious costumes all the time but damn would I do anything to
undress you and touch your beautiful long legs! Sanji! Do something please,
tell me you will be mine this morning. I want you so bad and I am so hard right
now all because of you!”
He couldn’t handle it anymore, so he did what his body wanted, opened his eyes,
looked at the boy in front of him and kiss him hard.
***** Memories ( part 2 ) *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
The kiss was hard and hot and Sanji knew that he couldn’t refuse Ace any more.
It didn’t bother him that much, he wanted to make love with him he wanted slow,
heated, moaning love. So when Ace started to undress him it was all ok. His
shirt flew in some corner of the room followed rapidly by Ace’s shirt. Hand
touching everything, lips sucking and teeth scratching. Ace got on his knees
and started to unlock his belt, not even looking at Sanji but he said to
himself that he was ok, that it was what he wanted. So the boy was now
perfectly naked, and Ace was eating him with his eyes.
“God, Sanji! I knew you’d be beautiful but you are too much”
They kissed again and rolled on the couch, Ace kissing, licking and biting.
Because of his marvel skin Sanji had already his body full of bruises. “Can you
put your legs up my shoulders? I want to fuck you so bad!”
Sanji knew that he could but he really did want something else, he was not yet
prepared to receive the raven haired boy in him and he wanted more than a fuck.
“ Ace I …”
“Please Sanji you want it too. Look how hard you are! Don’t say no!”
He couldn’t resist. Those eyes that were begging him showed him the truth so he
did what the other had asked him to do. Ace scooped his pockets for lube and
started to prepare Sanji, two slicked fingers invading his body.
“Ace it hurts. Slow down!”
“Baby I can’t I want you too much! Please get used to it faster.” Sanji thought
that it was his fault, that his body was too sensible and he tried not to think
about the pain. Third finger entered very hard and Sanji almost started crying
because of the pain but he didn’t want the other too see him so he embraced
Ace, bending himself in half.
“Like that Sanji yes! Is it good? I will fuck you now!”
“ Ace where is the condom?”
”We don’t need them I am clean trust me!”
“No Ace we need … “ but before he could finish his sentence Ace was fully in
him. Sanji scream because of hurt, but Ace took it as pleasure, so he grinned
harder. It didn’t last long, the boy was pent up, but the blond was bleeding
and feeling used. After the sex Ace realized what he had done so he was kind
and gentle, he washed Sanji up, put him in his PJs and embraced him in the bed.
He apologized and kissed him until he felt asleep. Unfortunately Sanji’s dreams
came more real and hurting than any other time but Ace was there, saying sweet
words and calming him down so Sanji believed that he wasn’t used for sex, it
was just pent up desire.
Morning came and Sanji got up from bed to make breakfast, Ace was fast asleep.
His body hurt very bad and he didn’t feel good but he tried smiling because now
he got someone. It was all his fault that he denied the boy for so long.
Breakfast almost ready, he felt hands on his hips.
“ So what is my babe doing good for me this morning?”
“Breakfast is almost ready Ace let me finish!”
“Awwwww! How much more?” he asked slapping Sanji’s ass. He swallowed a scream
of pain, because it was an excruciating pain inside him, psychically, but he
wanted not to be weak. It was his entire fault.
The days passed by, the actions repeated themselves, but he had someone
soothing him at night even though the dreams were getting harder to get back
from. Ace moved with him, for him, so he was not going to complain. He started
getting used to rough sex so he thought all was good. Months came and gone but
because of his dreams Sanji was closing himself more and more. Ace was starting
to come home later and finally, one night he hasn’t come home at all. They
fought the next morning because Ace was very drunk and didn’t answer Sanji’s
calls and all he could say was that he had fun and he forgot. He was a fire
dancer so he had to entertain a team of firefighters and he was invited to stay
after the show to have fun so he stayed. Sanji’s first mistake was to believe
him, to let himself be embraced by the drunkard and have rough sex. The story
repeated and Sanji forgave him every time, until one day when he came home from
work he found the house empty. No clothes but his, no plated of food left
through the house, no full ashtrays, nothing. It was like his boyfriend had
disappeared, as it was only his dream that he woke up from. Trying to call him
the number was not available any more. Sanji was getting desperate. What was
happening? Was it another nightmare? No he had to do something before he
panicked. He called his little brother Luffy, that by some fated chance was a
friend of Usop also. No one answered. He tried again, still nothing. “Ok, ok
slow down Sanji there must be someone I could call. His work!” He knew the name
of the company. So he entered the internet, Yahoo’s first news being some guy
that got cut almost in half by number one swordsman. He had no time to read
further so he searched for Playwithfire.com and called at the number given for
commands.
“Play with fire, how can I help you?” answered a smooth voice.
“Hello, I am sorry to disturb such a lovely lady as you but I can’t contact my
friend and I am a little worried. He works at Play with fire, his name is Ace,
Portugas Ace.”
“Who am I talking to?”
“Pardon my rudeness my beautiful flower, my name is Sanji”
“Wait just a second. P o r t u g a s. Well I am sorry Sanji but it seems that
your friend does no loger work here. He resigned a month ago.”
“Excuse me? Are you sure?”
“Definitely.”
“Ok then, thank you very much”
One month. One whole month of lying! Wait, one month? It was the first time
that Ace got home drunk. Was he having problems and he couldn’t tell Sanji?
The calling phone in his hand startled him. It was Luffy.
“ Hi Sanji how are you?”
“Not so well Luffy. Do you happen to know where Ace is?”
“ Ace? He left country yesterday night, hasn’t he told you?”
“No …” Ace left country. But why?
“Oh I am sorry Sanji I thought you knew. Did you have a fight? Did you broke
up?”
“No, he didn’t tell me a world. Do you know why he left?”
“ He said that he needed to do it.”
“But … “
“Oh, I am so sorry Sanji!”
“Yeah, me too. I need to think now Luffy, thank you for calling and telling
me.”
“Sanji, be safe!”
He felt like dying.
Chapter End Notes
     Ok now don't be mad at me it will get better I promise!
***** That's what friends are good for *****
Luffy looked at the phone with anger. He tried calling Ace. How dared he? Sanji
was his friend and nakama and Ace did something so horrible to him.
“Hey little bro, what’s up?”
“Why did you do it?”
“What are you talking about? I don’t know … “
“Ace! Why did you do it? Sanji is my friend I thought you loved him!”
“Yeah, about that, you see ….”
“WHY?”
“IT IS NOT FOR YOU TO KNOW!” Ace screamed and ended the conversation.
Luffy was now not only sad for Sanji but also angry at Ace. Well he couldn’t do
anything about Ace but he could try to make Sanji’s day better. Oppening his
agenda he called the only person who could help.
-Hey Luffy what’s up? I am having such a good day, let me tell you about it!
- Usopp!
-Wait, wait! Some girl from work came to me and confessed but I told her that
I, the great Usopp have my heart promised to…
- USOPP! Ace left to another country without telling Sanji.
-WHAT???? But… but … how? Why? I thought they were good for each other. Did
they fight? Where do you know about this? You know what I just finished work, I
will stop by your place. Wait for me. ‘Till then I have to call Sanji. Oh my
God! Call you right back!
 
- 3 months prior -
Usopp didn’t have time to call because his phone was ringing again, an unknown
number.
-Hello?
-Usopp, it’s me.
-No way Zoro? Are you alive?
-As much as I can be and will be heading home soon.
-Home as in home home? You will be back in town?
-Mhm.
-Oh my God it’s been so long!
-I know. 2 years already.
-Man I heard the news. Everybody said you are as good as dead. What the fuck
happened?
-Long story shart I met Mihawk and I thought I was prepared to challenge him.
Zorro’s tone was grim. Usopp was almost afraid to ask more.
- And?
-Long story short I was not and he proved it to me.
-Man that must suck.
-Tell me about it.
-Man I am sorry to end it short but I have some troubles and I have to deal
with them.
-Something happened?
-Yeah I think a friend of mine got dumped and I have to be there for him. Maybe
you should call Lufffy also. He will be so glad to hear you. By the way when
are you coming home?
-Two, maybe three months.
-Good to hear man, good to hear. I will save the number. Call me any time you
want.
Ending the call, Usop tried to reach Sanji but it was useless. His phone was
closed. That was not good. Usopp knew Sanji and his history, knew that his
friend would now close himself and suffer. He had to do something but what?
 
- Present –
Zoro just got home when a loud knocking sound has heard from the door. Not even
checking who it was he opened the door and was knocked down by a very happy,
slim, black haired but strong boy, arms like rubber embracing him.
-Zoroooooooooo!
-Hi Luffy! What a warm welcome! Now can you get away from me so I can breathe?
-You are back!
-Yes I am back.
-Hi Zoro!.
-Usopp! Glad to see you two.
-Zoro I have so much to tell you and so many things happened and I am glad that
you are not dead and…
-Luffy, you dumb ass, slow down.
-Sorry, sorry.
The boy was still in his lap, both on the floor. Usopp helped them both get up
and asked:
-Should we have a drink here or going into town?
-How about Merry?
-Ah …
-What?
-You see Zoro Merry was closed a while ago.
-Whaaaatttt???!!! But I liked that place.
-Yeah but we found some place very cool. It’s called Thousand Sunny and it’s
awesome!
-Usopp what are we going to do about Sanji?
-Who is Sanji?
-You know when we talked on the phone when you told me you were coming home?
And I said I have a problem with a friend who got dumped?
-Yeah, so?
-That friend is Ace’s ex. His name is Sanji and is a very good friend of mine.
-Ok. So what’s the problem if you want to meet him too just give him a call.
-Here comes the problem. The last three months he declined to do anything else
except work. He shouted himself down and we can’t reach him anymore.
-So what does he do?
-He’s a chef at Baratie.
-I know the place. He’s at work now?
-No, he had the morning shift so he is probably at home.
-And you really want him to come with us?
-Yeah, we tried to help him since they broke up but nothing helped and he is
not ok.
-Call him then!
Usopp got his phone from his pocket and tried to reach Sanji but his phone was
shut down.
-It’s closed.
-I will help you with your guy and if it works you’re paying my drinks tonight
how about that?
-Usopp the Great will pay your drinks for a week if you manage to help us. What
will you do?
-Give me this guy’s address. And you go at Zunny or what you said that place
was called.
-But Zorro …
-No buts. Go! I’ll call you later.
-OK. This is his address and this is the place’s address.
-Zorro, be careful he has a kick that really hurts.
-It’s that so Luffy? What else do I need to know? Can I play with him?
-No Zorro you are not allowed to hurt him! He is our friend and nakama.
-Ok ok you guys can leave. I will bring him.
-Good luck!
 
Zoro wanted to drink with his friends and to feel good so why the fuck has he
volunteered to do this shitty job? Sanji huh? He was waiting for the cab and
thinking what he should do. If his friends were worried he had to help no? And
is a friend can’t help the dude maybe a stranger could. The taxi came and took
him, he got there in 15 minutes, this guy was quite close from his place. It
was Friday evening so the perfect time to get into town and have a good time.
He had luck, the door was opened and he had to walk up only two floors. He
found the door and knocked. He didn’t know what he will do but he thought that
perhaps he will convince this guy to come with him. When the door opened he
froze, looking at the handsomest guy he saw since long. His words were blocked
in his throat as he looked in one wild blue eye, and even though it had little
red veins, it was like a wave had hit him. He noticed his blond hair that
seemed so smooth that he wondered if it would be soft to touch. Weird eyebrows,
so he was not perfect but the last think he saw was that the man in front of
him was holding an unlit cigarette in his mouth. His lips were almost white,
chapped but oh so very tempting. He wanted to say something. He wanted to ask
so many questions, he opened his mouth but nothing came out so he closed it
back.
 
Sanji got home from work and wanted just to sleep. To sleep and forget
everything. But he couldn’t so he just sat down on the bed and did what he did
every other day from three months ago, he closed his phone, and took a
cigarette in his mouth for support. He gave up on cigarettes for Ace, because
he worked with fire he disliked the smoke so Sanji at first did not smoke when
he was with Ace, but after they moved together he gave up on them totally. He
wanted to smoke now, wanted to lit it and let himself be a little free but he
couldn’t. What if Ace came back? Yeah right like that could happen. Sanji knew
it was not possible, he knew that he pushed Ace away and he will not come home
ever again. It was his fault again. He wanted to scream and cry but he couldn’t
any more. There were no more tears in his body, he had cried them all. Knock
knock knock.
What? Someone at the door? Maybe, just maybe it was Ace. He opened the door as
fast as he could but it was definitely not Ace. The green haired guy, what the
fuck was with that color, stood in front of his door, and he couldn’t help but
to stare a little at him. His face was masculine and sharp, but the thing that
attracted his attention was that he had an eye closed with a big scar over it
that gave him a bad guy aura. They looked at each other a few seconds and the
guy opened his mouth as to say something but closed it back. Disappointed that
it was not in fact Ace and mad that the man that appeared in front of his door
said nothing, he asked:
-Who the fuck are you shithead and what the fuck do you want?
***** Not so easy *****
Chapter Notes
     Sorry for being late guys. Just had a horrible week. Hope you like
     it!
Zoro came back from his reverie. Upset flew around his head.
“Who do you think you can call a dumb ass, dumb ass? Name’s Zoro. I came to get
you.”
“Huh? Get me? You wish you could.”
“I bet I can curly.” Zoro grinned wide. He was always giving as good as he got
and was not afraid of the consequences. And it looked like Sanj began to get
out of his own grief and get mad. Good!
“Where is your mask Zorro?” asked the blond with a cheeky smile. “And why the
fuck is your hair green?”
“Is Zoro with only one r. Come!”
“Like hell I am.” he said and tried to close the door but couldn’t because
Zoro’s boot was in the way. “What the fuck do you want?”
Zoro sighed. “I hoped it would be easy. You are not it seems. Look Usopp and
Luffy are waiting for us at the Zunny place or whatever. Come!”
“Usopp? He is in town? When? Where? And why did YOU come to get me? You know
what it doesn’t matter I am not coming so you can leave.”
Even though Sanji tried to sound annoyed something in his eye looked more like
hurt. Zoro tried, he really tried to do what Mihawk said.
~ If you want to do something right, you have to be patient. It has to be the
right time, right place and right feeling. You are a fool if you thought you
can fight me. Look where we are in a fucking parking lot. Look at the time!!!
It is 6 in the morning. Even if you had beaten me, there is no one around to
see. Look at you! In your running clothes. Did you really think that in this
state, at this hour and in this place you could face me? What a fool! You are
not bad so you won’t be a corpse but the next time I see you I want you to be
right, not jump like a dog at a bone!~
He was so not doing that right now. Fuck it! He growled and jumped on Sanji
with the intent to push him down and shove some intelligence in that blond head
of his. What he didn’t expect was Sanji’s foot in his chest right in the moment
he jumped to catch the guy. He was fast ok but so could he. Zoro grabbed the
foot and shoved it down in his fall.
The result was Sanji straddling Zoro. On the floor. Oh wow! Those blue eyes
were even bluer, with so many different nuances that Zoro was sure he wouldn’t
know to name it. He felt the door at his hands and shoved it close without
breaking eye contact. This was dangerous. Sanji didn’t need this. He was hurt
and Zoro was not an asshole.
“Get down.” He said very slowly as to not scare the other. Sanji got on the
floor and if his face was something to read, he was angry and he wanted to
shout so Zoro thought to do it before him so that he won’t lose.
“Before you shout and kick my ass …”
“No, you listen you dumb fuck!”
“Sanji SHUT THE FUCK UP!”
“WHO THE FUCK DO YOU TELL TO SHUT UP?”
Zoro was starting to really loose it so he did what he thought was necessary to
make the blond shut: strip. And oh was it a good measure to get his shirt off.
The other’s eye was about to come off his socket.
“Why the fuck are you sliced in 2?” His voice was just a whisper, the tone had
a little reverie in it. Good that meant no more shouting and bickering and… God
knows what. He wanted to go drink. Yes that was the reason. Huh, who was he
kidding? He was not Usopp to lie so bad. He really wanted to get the dumb ass
out of his house, out of his grief, out of his misery. But why? OK, to be frank
he looks so good but so bad right now. Big, black, thick, dark lines under his
beautiful eyes, his skin was to white even for a blonde person and he was so
fucking skinny, like almost anorexic.
Maybe he had looked too much, or maybe his being sorry was showing on his face
cause Sanji was mad again. So let’s explain and hope the dumb fuck will
understand.
“Maybe if you shut the fuck up I would have told you. I don’t brag and this is
not about me. I almost died. As you can see it is not pretty. Do you know what
our friends told me: good for you that you are not dead but we have a friend
that is in bigger pain than you and we have to help him.
The blonde froze. “What?”
 
The moment the green haired dude, Zoro was it, tried to push him down his
reflexes took the harnesses for him. He wanted to kick the stubborn fuck out of
his home. Who the fuck did he think he was, trying to enter his house and get
him out? He closed his phone for a reason, he didn’t want anyone with or around
him. Was it that hard? Yeah Usopp came to town but if he wanted to talk he
should have come himself not send this stupid.
His thoughts were erased completely after the hit took place because it was
being dragged down fast. What the fuck? And he was straddling the man.
He didn’t know what he should feel any more. Ok he could recognize the man was
hot in his own brutish way, something dangerous in his green eyes but he was
not ok. What if the man thought he did it intentionally? He was not a whore in
heat. Oh God that was what he probably was thinking while looking right in his
eyes. That now that he had him on he could use him. Disgracefulness and anger
filled Sanji the longer he looked at the man in front of him. And then he heard
the words said so calm and quiet. Just two words, get down. Oh it was better to
think that he was worth a fuck but it seemed not. He was so pitiful and ugly
and disgusting that he was not even wanted for a quick fuck. Sanji got down and
was about to collapse but looked at Zoro and wanted to scream.
“Before you shout and kick my ass …”
He had the nerve to talk first! What a stupid son of a bitch! He was really
angry right now and he was about to show that fucker what he was capable of.
He wanted the man to shut up and leave, he wanted to cry and sleep, he wanted …

“No, you listen you dumb fuck!”
“Sanji SHUT THE FUCK UP!”
Shouting in his house and telling him to shut up? The nerve! Who the fuck did
he think he was? Or did this man really think he was that weak and easy to
handle that he would do what he asked? Did everyone really had to laugh at him?
He was feeling cold and lacking energy for this but he had to try not to let
this situation slip from his fingers.
“WHO THE FUCK DO YOU TELL TO SHUT UP?”
And then it all ended. The man was striping. He was about to get raped. He will
fight no doubt about it but … OMG! He had lost his voice and thoughts at the
sight in front of him. The words slipped from his mouth without him wanting to.
Why the fuck are you sliced in 2?”
The man explained something about almost dying and his friends, both of them
friends it seems, not caring. He couldn’t believe it.
“What?”
Zoro frowned. “OK not really with this words but that I understood right then.
And I come home three months later and what? You are still the only one in
their little worried minds. Grow up, grow a pair and get over it! It’s just a
break up. No one died.”
Oh that was it! “Listen here you… you… you marimo!”
“What the fuck did you just called me you… you dartboard? “
***** The decision that will change everything *****
Chapter Notes
     It is sad that I had inspiration after a coworker said something not
     so nice to me so in this chapter I put more of my soul that I am used
     to. But it's not a bad for you guys. Hihi. Enjoy!
     P.S. Thank you very very very much for your kudos and comments. They
     keep my writing and this story alive. Luv you guys!
“How could you say that?” A big pain painted Sanji’s heart. Yes, Ace was not
dead, but he was not his anymore, he also couldn’t do anything to get him back,
Ace left and didn’t contact him ever since. He’s tears were falling without any
possibility to stop them. It just hurt so damn much and he was so lonely. Yes
he went to work, he spoke with his coworkers and laughed with the beautiful
ladies that stepped in the restaurant but he was so empty inside. That’s why
Zoro’s words hurt so much more than they should.
“Oi, oi, oi, don’t, please! I didn’t want to make you cry!” he heard Zoro
saying but didn’t want to look at him. He was not able to! He was so ashamed
about himself. He was so weak! No wonder no one wanted him. He was too engulfed
in his own sorrow.
But then he felt it, he felt someone else’s body heat and the marimo was hotter
than a fireplace.
“What are you … hic … doing?” he asked between tears and trembles. It was a
very little quiet voice.
“Embracing you, it is my fault you are crying so I am taking responsibility.”
Zoro was as quiet as him and his voice let no pity, worry or anything else,
just soothing.
“Why? Don’t you dare pity me!.” He tried to yell and scream but all he could
handle was like a little kitty hissing.
“I’m not.” Smooth, quiet voice in his ear. He felt the embrace tightening a
little.
Zoro’s right hand stayed on his back while the left moved to the blond hair,
slowly touching his neck and head. Sanji managed to not cry anymore and wanted
to get away from the green haired man but he couldn’t move. It has so hard to
get out of the embrace because it was the first time in three months, maybe
even more, when he felt warm. Realizing this, he felt his tears rolling from
his eyes again. He barely managed to say a few words.
“Let me go, please!”
“Why? Give me a good enough reason and I will do it.”
“Why are you doing this? Why are you embracing me? I am not worthy! Go! Leave!”
“I won’t, so don’t struggle anymore! I want to do this and there is almost
nothing you can tell me to make me let you go now. So you could as well give
up!”
What the fuck was with this man, he was sweet and infuriating in the same time.
He was a stranger, but he was feeling so close to him right now.
 
Feeling like the blond man from his arms could react both ways at his words he
thought what he should do. He had no idea what he was doing just that it felt
right. Sanji was broken, he felt that and even though he didn’t know the blond,
his tears made his heart clutch in his chest. So he took the stranger in his
arms and it felt the right thing to do.
Caressing his head and embracing him he started slowly swinging his hips in a
little kind of dance. The sound of the whining stopped but the man said nothing
any more just stood in his embrace and let himself be slowly swayed.
He got scared when he felt Sanji slip away. Zoro could not believe, when he
took a closer look at the blond head, that he was sleeping on his feet. He
really felt asleep in his arms. A smile appeared on the green head’s face. He
continued the action long enough to be sure Sanji was not going to wake up if
he stopped and then he took him in his arms and put him in the bed. He was
lucky that he found the dormitory in his third try, first entering in the
kitchen and bathroom. He didn’t know the man’s house so he had nothing to be
ashamed for. There was no blush on his cheeks and even if it was there was no
one around to see it.
Zoro tried to slip away but then the sleeping men’s head moved very fast and
his breath fastened. He looked like he started having a nightmare the moment
Zoro’s body got away from him so Zoro did what he thought the blond deserved,
moved in the bed with him, placed a hand in his hand and with the other
caressed the other’s face while shushing very, very quiet. Did he really relax
just by being touched? How lonely did this man feel? How much did he need
someone to get him up? The more he thought, the more he felt Mihawk’s words
coming back: ~ It has to be the right time, right place and right feeling. ~
He wanted to help. Did he really? He looked at the man soundly sleeping. His
eyes were red and puffed on the surface, and dark almost to the cheeks, his
lips were almost colorless and chapped but it looked like he was deep asleep.
Yes, he wanted to. It was the right feeling right there. Not pity but the need
to see the other man smile. He felt it will be a long road with many obstacles
and problems and they were still strangers but this is what he wanted. He was
feeling a little proud that he got through Sanji’s defenses.
Zoro realized he was not going to get out drinking with his friends as he
planned, with or without the person on his left, and seems he was not bothered
by it at all. He took the phone from his pocket and saw he had some unread
messages. So that he won’t wake the blond up, he first put it on mute and then
looked at the messages. It was kinda hard to do all this with just on hand but
he was not about to release Sanji’s hand, not that he could, his hand was being
hold so tightly that he almost couldn’t feel it any more but he was not going
to do anything about it. If this is what Sanji needed, than he would give it.
All five messages were from Usopp.
“Dude are you there? Did you get to the address ok?”
“Please tell me you didn’t get lost”
“Guys tell me you are not fighting right now.”
“Are you ok?”
“WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING AND WHY ARE YOU NOT ANSWERING MY MESSAGES?”
With a little chuckle he started writing.
“Usopp breath. I am ok. I believe Sanji is too but we can’t come with you
tonight. When are you leaving back to your home? I haven’t been able to ask you
why are you here anyway.”
“WTF dude? I was going crazy. We are coming there so we will talk.”
Zoro felt a pang in his gut. He didn’t want his friends there. He had a hunch
that Sanji would just put a mask and will hide himself again.
“Um how about we talk tomorrow? Really Sanji is in no position to talk right
now.”
“What did you do??????”
“Relax, nothing bad. Or so I think. We had a little fight, about that dumb
brother of Luffys (what’s his name anyway?) Sanji kinda reacted not so ok but
now he is …. Uhhh … he can’t talk. Promise we will talk tomorrow.”
“Zoro I swear to God if you did something to him I will break that door if I
have to. You know how many followers I have in this city. We will invade you
and burry you alive!”
“HE IS SLEEPING YOU DUMBFUCK SO SHUT THE FUCK UP. I think he really need it.”
“Oh. Sleeping? And you? Did you two do something? I mean I have nothing against
it but isn’t it a bit fast?”
“No, we didn’t do anything. I just …. Just let it go. Tomorrow we should talk
more. Um but I do have something to ask you.”
“Spit it out.”
“Should I stay or should I go? I don’t know what to do.”
“Hmmm you should stay man. Maybe he really needs someone to force him open up a
bit. But if you want to leave you should wake him up.”
“Then I will stay. He looks like he really needs the sleep.”
“OK. Talking tomorrow yeah?”
“Promise.”
 
Sanji woke up in the first time since forever feeling like he had energy and
less tired. He was also confused, he just woke up himself not another
nightmare. Wait when did he go to sleep? He felt something strange and new. He
was clutching on someone’s hand and he was being embraced, cuddled? What the
fuck? He didn’t cuddle with Ace, the man turning his back on him the moment
they were done with sex. He was so confuse, who the fuck ….? He opened his eyes
and tried to turn his body to face the other in his bed but he couldn’t. He was
being held a little bit harder. He felt more then heard the next words in the
back of his neck.
“Mornin. Don’t freak out on me. SSSSShhhhh. It’s ok. Do you remember who I am?”
He seemed to know the voice but who was him and how did he end up in his bed?
What did he do last night? Did he get drunk? No. But then?
“No. So let me go!”
“Ok, I will, but don’t kick me ok?”
“LET ME GO I SAID!” He got out from the embrace and looked at the figure next
to him.
“Oh …. Marimo.” He said with his eyes wide opened. And then all his memories
came back in a splashing wave.
***** The green prince charming *****
“Yeah, me! Again, morning’”
“Uh yes morning! What…? Why …?” his voice was stuck in his neck. He remembered
being swayed and embraced by the green haired man but then?
“Don’t die on me now. You just felt asleep and that’s it. You were tired.”
“Did you do something to me?”
“Oh come on what do you take me for?”
“I don’t know you are just a stranger.”
Zoro was starting to get mad again. He really tried to do well and help this
blond headed idiot and all he could say was that?
“Well this stranger hold you and your hand all night long because you needed
the sleep, this stranger stopped our friends to barging in here and ask you
things you didn’t want to answer,” he was starting to yell, how dare he say
something like that? “and this stranger will now go fuck himself because he is
a stupid thinking that the ass in front of him would be grateful for what he
did, but you will come tonight at the Zunny or else I will be the one that
breaks your door. I am sick and tired of our friends being worried because your
worthless ass.” He took his shoes and left the apartment with a big bang. Just
three seconds have passed when he entered again and yelled “And keep your damn
phone open!” And left again. The road to home was quiet, it was Saturday
morning and everyone was asleep. Why was he so mad? He knew that Sanji would
not react well but to ask him if he did something? That was the drop that
filled the glass. Yes he did he was a human being and cared when someone was
hurt. He wasn’t even gay to begin with, but he could recognize that the blond
caught his attention. He was the kind of man that tried everything once so he
was not a stranger to human body, and Sanji’s body, even though was weakened
and he believed sick, was something to behold. Was that it? Was that why he
felt so mad? Clearly no! He looked around, not recognizing the area. “Where the
fuck am I?”
 
Sanji could say nothing. Was he really so heartless? Well no but what could he
do? It was a very difficult situation waking up with a man that he didn’t know
feeling refreshed? What the fuck could he think? It was something very hard to
believe that someone stayed with him a night because he wanted him to sleep.
And holding his hand? He did open his phone and saw a lot of messages and voice
messages. Luffy screamed and yelled that he wanted to eat the food that he
cooked and why did he not come at the Sunny even though Usopp was in town.
Usopp was there also with messages saying that Zoro convinced him tonight to
not come but tomorrow if he didn’t he will be so angry as a best friend.
Why were his friends so worried? He thought he hidden his problems good but it
seems that he couldn’t do even that well. Was he really no good for no one? He
had to be good for someone at some point. He wanted to be loved. In the moment
he thought that he remember the way that Zoro held him close, not letting him
go and dancing with him in his arms. No wonder he felt asleep. He had been a
really jerk but he didn’t know what to do. He had to think of something till
tonight. Hmmm tonight but when? It was 9 in the morning, would Usopp be awake?
Maybe he should wait a little bit more. He was hungry, and for a first since
forever he didn’t feel like vomiting. Did he really need sleep that bad? Yes
and he knew that but why had the nightmares didn’t come? Even when he sleep
with Ace the nightmares were always there. So why?
Maybe if the plant wouldn’t had left like that he could have made him breakfast
to say thank you but he was scared and said harsh words to him. He now felt bad
but what could he do but wait? And then his phone started ringing, best friend
song was Usopp’s.
“Sanji!” yelled the curly man. “Dude I was so worried! Zoro told me to let you
sleep because you look like you really need rest and …”
“Usopp slow down! I was tired, I am not deaf. I am … ok now.”
“Oh really? That’s good. Is it Zoro there with you? “
“No.”
“But he said that he would stay the night. What, did he leave in the night? Did
he at least wake you?”
“He stayed the night and then left.”
“Why? Your food is the best.”
“He didn’t get to the food part.”
“Sanji what the fuck happened?”
“Just me and my big mouth screwed up.”
“Oh. You were mean to him. But why Sanji he was good with you.”
“How the hell should I know? He is just a stranger to me, how could I know that
he didn’t do something?”
“Well do you feel bad? Is your … back hurting or maybe other parts of your
body?”
“No but …”
“Sanji, Zoro is not even gay. It is true I haven’t seen him with girls too much
either but you get the idea. HE is a little nasty sometimes but so are you and
… “
“I get it Usopp I will say sorry tonight. By the way when are we meeting and
where? Zorro was kind of confused?”
“Oh tonight at 8 let’s say at Sunny.”
“Ok.”
“By the way do know if he took the taxi? He can’t find his way most of the
time.”
“He left very angry and screaming at me so I have no idea.”
“Oh fuck do you know if he had his wallet?”
“No.”
“I have to call him.”
“Wait, give me a message with his number. I own him so maybe I can be a little
bit of help. If he is still in the streets like a lost puppy I will go and find
him.”
“Sanji be nice to him. We really almost lost him.”
“Yeah I saw the scar.”
“How? You said you didn’t do anything!”
“He wanted to shut me up so he undressed his T-shirt.”
“Nice strategy.” Usopp was almost laughing. “Did you droll a little?”
“Usopp! How could I? I saw a man almost cut in half.”
“Yeah, yeah and you didn’t look at his chest and muscles at all. Cut the
bullshit Sanji. I know you better than this. If I was into men and wasn’t so
scared of him, I would droll.”
“Ok just shut up.” Sanji then sneezed hard.
“Man you’re either about to get sick or someone is talking about you.”
“Hope the second one cause I have no time to be sick or cold. Give me marimo’s
number. ”
“Oh Sanji behave! Waiting forward to seeing you tonight!”
He got the number and without thinking he called. Once, twice, and he got an
answer.
“Roronoa here.”
“So not just your hair is stupid, but your name also.” Sanji realized that he
screwed up again but he couldn’t help it. When he heard that voice he got
weird, his body shaking and a small smile appeared on his face so he wanted to
hide it, unfortunately with a bad remark.
“What the fuck do you want jerk? Couldn’t sleep?”
Sanji was mad again. Yeah he started it but the other didn’t have to be such a
jerk.
“I heard a lost puppy was walking through town and needed help. So where are
you?”
“Shut the fuck up! I am no lost puppy and I am at home. Where did you got the
number?”
“Usopp called me… A … a… a.. chu!”
“What happened princess, not feeling so good?” Even though he asked like that
he was being worried. Did he not cover him up last night? He remembered he did.
And he is warm all the time, everyone who shared a bed with him told him that.
“No you plant the boys probably talk about me. Glad the marimo is at home. See
you tonight at Sunny. Remember the name you plant.”
“Knock it off with the names already dartboard brow. I will see your ugly mug
tonight.” And the call was over.
 
 
It was late in the evening and Sanji didn’t feel so good. The sneeze turned in
cough and all his body hurt. He really should get up and dress for the night
but he couldn’t. He felt hot and all his body hurt. Usopp was going to kill
him. So he called him.
“Sanji I hope you are about ready for the night!”
“Uh yeah Usopp about that … cough cough … I don’t feel well. I would ask you to
come here but I am afraid I will transfer the … cough cough … cold. Please
forgive me.”
“Oh man really?”
“I really want to come but I can’t.”
“Oh well. But Luffy will be disappointed.”
“I know. Tell him I will cook for him when we will see each other. Soon ok?
Cough cough cough!”
“Man you don’t sound so good.”
“Yeah, I will try to get a little bit of rest. You are not leaving soon, no?”
“Neah man I have a whole month course about web design.”
“That’s good. I will make it up I promise!”
“Ok man be well. See you!”
He really wished he had some pills in house or maybe he could just sleep
without his nightmares once, no twice now. He felt dizzy, his head was making
strong noises and … No, that was not just in his head. That was the door. Who
the fuck could be? Usopp seemed to understand that he was not ok so who could
it be? Opening the door, he was shocked.
“Hey, princess! I heard you are sick.”
***** Fever and nightmares *****
Zoro really didn’t know what he was thinking. Or maybe he did but he didn’t
want to allow the thought to overwhelm him. Why was he in front of this guy’s
door with his rucksack containing a change of clothes and caring a bag of food
and medicine? Because he liked the blond, he liked him a lot, but not like
that. Not with that broken smile, not with those scared eyes, not with that
mask on his face. Oh no, he liked him bothered, hot and screaming, he liked
when his eyes burned with passion, fuck he just liked him. And he saw this side
of him the moment the blonde wanted to kick him, when they started arguing and
he realized that he wanted to see more. But right now he just got to be patient
and calm, really, really calm because as hot as he was, he drove him insane.
“I told you that I would break your door if you didn’t come. I understood that
you are sick so I didn’t break it but I am here to punish you because of that.”
“Wha … cough cough … moss … cough.”
“Yeah, yeah, curly, good to see you too. Get in the house before you die.”
Not listening the coughing Sanji anymore he pushed him in the house and closed
the door.
“You look like shit! Get into the bed while I heat the soup.”
Between coughing and breathing, Sanji still managed to throw a nasty look at
Zoro, but he shut up and got on the couch, embracing the heat of the blanket. 5
minutes later, when Zoro entered the room with the soup, Sanji was already
asleep. Thank God he heated the soup too much. Letting the blond sleep a little
more, Zoro went to the bathroom and changed in something more comfortable,
sport green pants and a white T-shirt.
The apartment was quiet and dark and Zoro was thinking what to do, if he should
wake Sanji or not but his thoughts were interrupted by a horrible scream.
Almost slipping on the bathroom floor he ran to the couch where Sanji was
yelling and crying.
“Sanji wake up! Come on Sanji it’s just a bad dream! Sanji!”
“No! No please! Old man! Help!”
“Sanji wake up!”
“Huh? Zoro? What are you doing here?”
“Thank God you are awake!” Zoro looked at the shaking man in front of him and
without realizing he took him in his arms.
“Zoro what are you doing?”
“Shhhh it’s OK!”
“No! Let me go!”
“Not until you stop shaking.”
“Please let go I can’t … “ His voice was a little whisper.
“You can tell me if you want to or not. Try to calm down. Hey listen to me I am
not going anywhere so it’s ok.”
Those were the words that shattered his walls a little and because he was so
weak he let it go. He began crying with all his soul, like it was the last time
he could do it. Sobbing and yelling and coughing, he was a total mess and Zoro
decided that whatever happens he will be there for the blond, even if it would
kill him. Because he was never as shuttered as he was now holding Sanji. His
heart was broken for him and he wanted to do something, anything to help him.
“It’s ok. It’s alright. You are ok!” he tried to put all his conviction in his
words. He knew it was not ok, the situation, the nightmare, the person who was
crying but he had to try to make it better.
“Shhhh… Breathe Sanji, that’s right, breathe.” He took his head and lift it so
that he could wipe his tears with his fingers. What he saw in those eyes the
moment he looked into them was a storm. A storm on the sea, horrible but
breathtakingly beautiful, strong and powerful but you let it willingly take you
away and drown you. In that moment, without him realizing, Zoro said just one
word: “Gorgeous!”
 
Sanji was hurt, but a little bit lighter. Zoro hold him while he cried, and he
hasn’t cried from the bottom of his heart like now since long time ago, then
the other man tried to calm him down and he wiped his tears. His gesture was so
intimate and he felt those golden eyes as if they were looking in his soul. But
the thing that scared him more was only a word, a word that he never used, not
even for his beautiful ladies, gorgeous.
“Don’t say that! I’m … anything but that. I am ugly, and weak and… “ Sanji
tried to get away from the heat of the other one embrace, tried to look down,
anywhere but his eyes.
With a growl and a nasty look, the other man took his head and lift it. These
fiery eyes that were leaving limbs of fire in his soul through his eyes were
mad.
“It’s my turn to say it back then, don’t you dare say that again. You are
anything but ugly and weak. Yes, you are annoying as hell, heh, and you combust
at every little flame that appears in your way, and I can tell that you have a
great weight on your heart and shoulders but you are alive, you try to get
through life without anyone’s help and if that is not strength I don’t know
what it is.”
Sanji was speechless. He couldn’t even cough anymore, he couldn’t breathe.
“What are you trying to achieve? Why are you being so good to me? I don’t
deserve it. So why? What do you want from me?” His voice was rising every word
he got out his mouth. It has to be something, no one was good to him without a
reason. “Is it sex you want?”
Zoro’s face was getting from dark to pure black. But why? Was this his plan, to
hide until he could get him in bed and then “Bam wham thank you mam’”? Why were
those gold eyes turning earth brown?
 
Zoro was sick and tired of this. He was good and wanted to help and what was
that help taken for?
“Aaaaaaaa! You are so god damn annoying you shit, you and your shitty ideas. Is
it so hard to believe that I want to help you?”
“Yes! It is very hard to believe something like th…cougn cough cough. Shit …
cough… fuck!”
“Argh! Shut th fuck up and sit your stupid ass down. I will go and reheat the
soup.”
“No … cough … don’t touch my kitchen cough cough.”
“Shut the fuck up you stupid fuck. Sit your ass down and wait there!”
While he put the plate in the microwave to heat it he heard a loud boom. He
hurried in the living room and Sanji was on the floor coughing, face red.
“You stupid! I told you to sit your ass down. The fuck did you do?” The moment
he touched him he realized what the problem was, Sanji was having a fever.
“Ah shit.” Losing his temper he lift the other man and got him in the bathroom.

“Yelp cough”
“Shut up you are not ok!” His was just thinking that he had to lower the fever.
He learned that a warm bath was sometimes all it got so he got Sanji’s shirt
off and was trying to held him up so he would remove his pants also when the
blonde screamed.
“What?”
“Why are you undressing me? No, please, I don’t want to!” He was crying again
but this time his eyes were hollow and lifeless.
“Shit! Sanji! Sanji! Look at me!”
“No, please no, I don’t want to! Let me go please!”
Having no other possibility Zoro entered the shower dressed with Sanji in his
arms.
“You stupid blond, don’t you see I want to help? Look at me!”
When Sanji looked at him, he seemed more present.
“You have a fever. We have to take it down and the easiest way was warm water.
I am not going to do anything to you until you ask for it, do you hear me?”
“Yes! I feel bad.”
“No kidding! You let me take our clothes off?”
“No, leave! I can handle!” Cough, cough.
“What the fuck do you think you can handle when you barely stand? Come on don’t
be stupid.”
“Leave me alone!”
Grrrrrrrrrrr.
“The moment you are well I will kick your ass! Pants down now!”
And not waiting for Sanji to answer again he undressed him. He was still
dressed but it didn’t matter he was ok as long that Sanji was not crying or
being scared any more. He began to imagine what his nightmares were, and it
made him ill in the stomach but now was not the time. He just held Sanji
standing in the shower. His hands were touching just his waist and he realized
with horror that his both hands could grab him whole. Why the fuck was he so
skinny?
“How are you feeling?”
“A little better. Don’t look at me.”
“Chill!” He put his palm on his face and neck and truly to Sanji’s words the
fever was already down.
“Try to not fall. I will just get a towel.”
“They are not here.”
“Then where?”
“In the dormitory, in the dresser.”
“Ok I want you sitting.”
“’Scuze you?””
“Ahhhh! “What the fuck is in your tiny head? SIT!”
“Why? I am not doing what you want.”
“Because the next time you fall because of the fever, malnourishment, and
dizziness you will really break that hollow head of yours!”
“Oh…”
“Yes oh so now sit your ass down.” Even though he was mad and barely helping
not to slap that stupid of a human he held him tight until he was sitting and
then left to search for a towel. After 10 minutes of searching he finally found
one big enough and even some warm PJs. He got back in the bathroom and a more
present blond was looking at him.
“Come on up! I will help you with these.”
“I don’t need help I can do it myself.”
“The next time you are saying no to me I swear to God I will slap your skinny
ass.”
“Hey! I am not skinny!”
“Yeah sure and those hipbones that are almost out of your skin say exactly
that.”
“I said don’t look!”
“Sanji! Up!”
He got up and Zoro dried him up and helped him with his clothes. After he
helped him get in his dormitory he wanted to get the soup when a hand caught
the back of his shirt.
“Please don’t go!”
***** Baths, wet clothes and skin *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Zoro tried very hard not to yell at him, not to tell him to decide his mind
already to … to … and he forgot it all the moment he saw those blue eyes almost
crying again. Fuck he was going crazy with this blond and it is his entire
fault that he felt for him.
“You have a fever and most likely you are hungry but you really don’t realize I
am drenched? Let me change, I will bring you soup and then you will sleep. No
commentaries. OK?”
“And you? Will you stay?”
“Yes of course I will stay. I won’t let you like that. That’s why I am here.
Now let go of my shirt.”
“No. cough cough “
“What do you mean no you dumbass?”
“What if you leave? I will be alone again and they will come for me and I don’t
know if I can fight them again. Stay!”
His face was red, his eyes had a glow, an abnormal one. He was burning again
and Zoro was pretty sure he was delirious.
“OK I won’t go but I really have to change. I will borrow some pants and a
shirt is that ok with you Sanji?”
“They won’t fit, you are huge. Yes huuuuuge!” The man started laughing and
coughing and Zoro didn’t know what to do any more. “You can protect me can’t
you? Because they will come again and I can fight but not with all of them and
… and … and I don’t want that to happen again.” He had tears in his eyes, the
trembling was acute and he looked like he was about to have a panic attack.
“Sanji look at me! I will protect you from them. I promise!”
“Will you? Will you really? I can’t… not again … not any more … no please!”
“Sanji! I am here!”
From where he was staying, not even bothering with the wetness of his clothes,
he kneeled in the bed and took the other one in his arms. He really wanted to
protect him, him from now and him from the past. What could he do? He looked at
him, crying and laughing and coughing and in that second he knew that he would
really do anything for the guy.
“Do you think you will remember this tomorrow?”
“Me? I think so, or maybe not. I don’t know, why?”
And in that moment Zoro wanted to do what he thought was best, what he wanted
for such a long time, but he had to behave, not to overdo it. He got out of the
bed with Sanji in his arms.
“Zoro…?”
“The bed is wet now, I have to change the sheets. Where are you keeping the
clean ones?”
He put Sanji on the desk near the bed and went for the living room.
“Zoro…?”
His voice was worried and scared.
“I told you I won’t leave. Stay there and don’t move. I still have the clothes
in which I came here so that should do it.”
He returned dressed in a shirt and jeans, he changed the sheets and lifted
Sanji in his arms again so that he could put him in bed.
“Can you not fall asleep while I warm your dinner? You really should eat a
little. It is important to eat for …”
“Let it go marimo, I am a chef, I know what you are trying to say but my throat
feels like needles and I can barely swallow.”
“Stay there, a little soup, pills and sleep and you will be better tomorrow.
Ok?”
“OK. Marimo.”
“Hmmm…?”
“Thank you. I still don’t know why you are doing this but thank you!”
“We should talk tomorrow cook.”
He got in the kitchen, warmed the soup, got a glass of water and the pills and
went for the dormitory and found Sanji already asleep and most probably having
a nightmare again. He hurried to put the objects from his hands on the desk and
got to the man.
“Sanji! Sanji! It’s ok. I am here. Wake up! NOW!
“Huh…? Ah Zoro I felt asleep. I’m Ok. I’m …”
“No you are not and it seems that I have to do something about it but now here,
soup, eat!”
“Argh ok, ok.”
There were moments of silence, combined with coughing, until Sanji finished his
bowl of soup.”
“Thank you marimo, I think I really needed it, but I am very tired right now.
If you leave please leave the key in the post box. “
“I said I will not go so stop trying to act strong.”
“I am strong.”
“Maybe you are, but you will have to prove it to me when you get better.”
“I could show you now you son of a bitch… cough cough”
“No right now you will show me that you know how to take kindness from others.
What do you think can you do it mr. High and Mighty?”
“What do you mean?”
“Pills first. Come on take them so you can sleep and be well.”
“Yeah I will take them. But sleep …. I don’t know what to say.”
“Shhh, less talking more taking pills. We shall see what we will do with the
rest.”
Zoro began to unlock his belt while he was talking.
“What are you doing you weed. Why are you undressing?”
“Shut up. It’s not what your perverted head is thinking. I will sleep with you
so that if your fever gets up or you are feeling bad I could help you but I
drenched my pair of pants when I tried to give you a bath and I cannot sleep
with the jeans on.”
“Aaaa… right. I don’t think I have a pair of pants that will fit you and you
don’t have to sleep with me. I mean you can take the couch from the living
room.”
Zoro was chuckling.
“What are you laughing you plant?”
“Stop with the naming already. You told me the opinion that you have about my
body so it’s ok I won’t rip any of your pants with my huuuge body.”
He was laughing copiously now and Sanji was blushing like crazy. Not only he
remembered that he said that but Zoro was now just in a shirt and his undies
and walking to the bed he was in. And even though he was sick he knew that the
heat was not from the fever. The man looked damn good and he knew it, and Sanji
was alone from some time.
“Zoro, I don’t think this is going to work. I won’t be able to sleep and.. and
…”
“Shut up!” he said and got himself under the blanket. “It is time to test your
endurance.”
“What???”
“Get up and sit on your ass.”
“Why?”
“Someone did this to me when I was at my lowest point and it really did help a
lot so now I want to help you. Will you let me Sanji?”
The green haired man was looking right into his eyes and talking very slow and
Sanji’s eyes were looking at those slim but plump lips and he knew that he
wanted to kiss Zoro more than everything.
“Sanji…?”
“Yes. I will let you.”
“Good then, sit on the bed and please leave me some space right in front of
you. I promise I won’t do anything that you will not let me to do.”
“How can I let you space in front of me?”
“Like this.” And Zoro touched his feet slowly while looking right in his eyes,
opening them.
“Zoro what…?” He was scared. What was that? His heart was beating hard but he
was not quite 100 percent it was all because he was scared but a little part of
him wanted to see what would Zoro do. No, no, no, he could not permit anything
that … that… Oh but he realized that he really wanted to let it happen. Because
he was weak and dumb and …
“Sanji.” Just a whisper from Zoro. “Sanji, please come back.”
“Zoro I can’t.”
He wasn’t trying to move his feet away but he wasn’t letting them close again
either.
“I told you I won’t do anything you don’t want and I know that maybe you are
right not to trust me right now because you don’t know me but please trust me!
I really want to spar with you, maybe you could show me the shitty food you
make and go out with our friends.” His voice the entire time was a whisper,
their eyes looking at each other and the blond swallowed hard and didn’t know
what to do. In that moment Zoro’s hand started moving again and Sanji let them.
He was afraid but he was also curious and maybe a little tented to let himself
go, not thinking. Zoro moved his legs just enough that his knees were close to
Sanji’s bottom, almost touching but not doing it, just a little barrier.
“Thank you Sanji.”
He couldn’t talk, he couldn’t respond, they were so close and half of him
wanted to run away, to laugh the matter off and get the green haired man out of
his house and life, but the other part of him wanted to jump on Zoro, wanted to
hold him and to be hold. He wanted to kiss him, touch him and make a mess of
him, or maybe the other way around, he didn’t know any more, so instead of
doing anything he just stood there and waited to see what he would do, he kept
looking at the man in front of him. He realized that Zoro was getting his face
close to his and he waited for the kiss to happen, because he was sure this was
the next step but he was surprised the moment Zoro kissed his forehead.
“What… ?”
“Shhh … just feel, ok?”
Chapter End Notes
     So I was halfway with this chapter like yesterday or the day before
     but I believe I was upset because of work and wrote a total drama and
     it was so not my style so I deleted it all and started it from the
     begging. Hihi. And I feel much better now. And because It was Sanji's
     birthday I will say Happy Birthday by updating the next chapter today
     also. So stay tuned :D
***** Lips on skin *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Zoro managed to get there and was not about to let the blond get away until he
felt loved and cared and would be able to sleep well. He wanted to see those
eyes not dead, but full of lights, he wanted to see a smile on the blonde’s
face. So he began easy, knowing that it will be hard for Sanji to receive all
that he will have to offer. A kiss on the forehead, a look at those beautiful
eyes, a kiss on the temple, again a look, a kiss on the cheek, a look, a kiss
on the chin, close oh so close of those beautiful lips, tempting lips, and a
look that revealed that Sanji’s eyes were a little bit closed, just a little
but the feeling was there, a kiss on the other cheek, Sanji started to breathe
on his mouth, a kiss on the temple, a look again on the other’s man face, he
was starting to melt. It was time to give more. Beginning with the same
patterns of kisses he also started to talk.
“You know, kiss, I like you, kiss, because you are strong, kiss, I like, kiss,
that you try to solve your problems, kiss, you dress nice also, kiss, your eyes
are beautiful, kiss, you are alive and fighting, kiss, and I would really like
to help you, kiss, so if you want, kiss, you can trust me, kiss, and tell me
what is eating you from the inside.” The last kiss was oh Sanji’s nose. He had
his eyes closed, breathing on his mouth, and his face was all red.
“Do you feel better?”
Just a whimper could be heard from the other one, as if words were too hard to
be spelled.
“Do you want to talk?”
“No, I can’t. Please don’t ask me that. Please, Zorro!”
“OK.”
Feeling that Sanji was not OK again, and realizing that he had to make him
forget at least for a night so that he could sleep well, Zoro took the other
man’s hands in his and started massaging each finger.
“Is this ok?”
“Why are you doing this?”
“I don’t want to answer you tonight so don’t ask any more. Just let yourself in
my hands.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
“Let’s try. Can you get up a little?”
“I think I can.”
“Ok. I will come behind you and you will lean on me. Is that too much?”
“I don’t think so.”
Zoro get behind him and encircled him with his feet. Sanji had his palms on his
eyes but Zoro would not allow that. He took them and put them on his feet. He
hands were hot from the fever maybe, or maybe from the actions he did that
night. He started massaging his head, easy and with sure fingers, getting
through the golden hair.
“Is this good?”
“Yes, my head hurts a little bit less.”
“OK, I will continue then.”
He got from the neck to his head and back, his skin was hot but so smooth. His
deft fingers were caressing and touching slowly and felt that Sanji was getting
slack. He did that without stopping until he felt the blond sleep soundly.
Lifting Sanji in his arms, Zoro had a bad taste in his mouth feeling how little
did the man from his arms weighted. He took him in his arms in the bed, got the
blanket on them both and tried to sleep, but it was easier said than done
because now that Sanji was sleeping he was feeling nervous. Would the other one
remember tomorrow what happened today or will they fight again? Zoro was sure
about his actions, and it was hard, oh so hard not to kiss him at least once
but it was not ok to do so when the blond was not really himself, having a
fever and being so tired. No, it was not good. He will have patience. Yes he
could do that. Tomorrow, or maybe today is Sunday and he still has time to take
care of him. And not just him he is sure, when he spoke with Usopp he was so
upset that he could not see the blond he could not think of anything more then
go and help him, but he was sure he was not the only one that wanted to see him
or help. Did he want to let them see Sanji? They were his friends but he didn’t
know how much it would help his mission to unlock the blonde’s mouth and heart
if their friends bargained there. But it could be strange if he told them not
to come. He felt asleep with those thoughts in his head and no resolve.
Next morning he woke up because of the smell of something delicious. He opened
his eyes and discovered he was alone in bed. Getting in the kitchen, his eyes
were blinded by the light and Sanji cooking and mumbling something. He wanted
to go and embrace him but thinking better it was too much. Patience Zoro,
patience. He leaned on the door frame and looked at him.
 
Sanji turned to go to the fridge and stopped. A very disheveled, sleepy Zoro
was standing there and looking at him. He remembered everything that last night
happened and his face grew red. It seemed the other noticed his shame and a
very cocky smile appeared on the men’s face.
“Morning Sanji!”
“Morning. Breakfast is not ready yet so you will have to wait a little bit
more.”
“You cooked for both of us?”
“Why are you so amazed? I am a chef, it is my duty to feed others.”
He looked at the man in front of him and saw that he was still smiling.
“What?”
“I’m glad you feel better cook.”
“Oh shut up.”
Being a little embarrassed he looked down just to see that Zoro had not changed
from last night and he was still in his underwear. A crimson shade invaded his
face, and Zoro took it bad, he embraced him.
“Are you ok, what happened?”
And it was the cherry on the cake. Sanji pushed him hard and started screaming
at him.
“You ask if I am all right thinking at what you did last night, or the fact
that you are ogling at me right now? I am not used to this kind of behavior so
leave me some space. And how about you go and take some pants, you pervert!”
“What is wrong cook, can’t take your eyes off me?”
“You wish! Go and let me make breakfast.”
The man was as sweet as infuriating. He was everything he didn’t ever have. He
was …. He felt so weak now because of him. He was held and kissed, those lips
were so hot and smooth, and when he woke up Zoro was holding his hand again and
embraced him stronger when he wanted to get up. But he couldn’t let himself be
swept off his feet. Or could he..? It was so confusing but he never felt so
loved or appreciated like the moment Zoro began kissing and caressing him. Was
it a way to woo him and having ulterior motives? No, the man spoke clearly and
sincerely, no? It was what he felt yesterday that he could fall asleep because
he was safe. Yes, safety was the main word for last night.
But nothing, oh no nothing was more confusing than his main problem, he hasn’t
dreamed the nightmares again. Two nights with Zoro and no nightmares in his
embrace. What the hell was happening? How was it possible?
The breakfast was done so it was time to talk with Zoro. But what to say, how
to address the problem? Last night Zoro wanted answers and maybe he could tell
him. Was he allowed to talk with someone else about his nightmares? About his
past? But what is Zoro would feel repugnance? Or pity, did he want his pity?
Definitely no! He was brought back to present by Zoro who entered the kitchen
with his pants on, but with no shirt, rubbing his hair with a towel. The scar
was big and ugly but it fit the men like a glove.
“Food ready?”
“Yeah be right there and put a shirt on.”
“Are you this timid?”
“No dumbass you will catch a cold.”
“Oh, so you do care.”
“Argh, how can you be so annoying?”
“I think I caught it from you.”
There was no malice in his words, just a large smile on his face.
“Let’s eat. Then maybe we will talk a little, because this situation is weird
as fuck.”
Chapter End Notes
     As promised the second chapter for Sanji's birthday. Enjoy!
***** Where even the devils cried *****
Chapter Notes
     WARNING! WARNING!
     TEAR GAS AHEAD!
Zoro needed a plan and he needed it now. He had to distract the blonde while he
forced his story out. It was the last thing he thought he could do for him. He
needed something but what?
While thinking hard he put his fork in his food and got it in his mouth, and
that was the moment all his thoughts evaporated. He closed his eyes, a groan of
pleasure and a sigh, a little moan you could say escaped him. A light chuckle
was heard from close and he opened his eyes to see those blue eyes happy for
the first time. It was a sight to behold. That was it! He had to mingle with
food somehow.
"Well cook remember that I had to eat hospital food for a loooong time so
anything other is good but how am I supposed to know?"
"So you are not man enough to say that you like it?"
"Are you man enough to say that you are feeling better because of me?"
"What does that have to do with what we were talking?"
"You can cook OK."
"Just OK?"
"Yes just OK. Do you have anything to say?"
"I will show you at lunch!"
"Oh, so I am staying at lunch?"
"Aaa... are you...?"
"You invited me so you are not getting rid of me right now" Zoro said while
grinning maniacally.
"Who invited you mass head, you can leave right now! Why don't you?"
"Hey cook don't you think you are bothering me while I am eating? Isn't this
against the rules or something?"
Sanji went white. Oh my God how could he let it happen? Even if it was a
bastard, everyone deserved to eat in peace.
"Don't die on me cook. I am glad you are not yelling any more but I don't want
you to shut up. How about you come here and eat with me?"
"I've been just an asshole with you and you are inviting me to eat with you?
Why are you doing this Zoro? No, wait don't answer. You have to know something.
I am broken, I am not worthy and I can't...." the blonde's voice broke. He was
not crying bot his whole body was trembling and his fists were white.
"You can't what Sanji?" Zoro asked slowly, almost whispering as to not startle
the other man.
"I can't have a decent relationship. I can't be loved because I am putrid. I
can't love because I am broken. So stop! Please, just stop because your warmth
will make things so much more difficult."
"You say you are putrid but doesn't that stink in general?"
"What the fuck are you asking you damn plant?"
"Well if you are putrid all your body is infected, so your hands also, no?"
"What are you implying?"
"That if you were putrid you would have infected the food that you cooked. That
means that you make people sick with your food. Is this true cook?"
"No ... I would never ... What are you ...? .... " One blue big eye was looking
at him frightened.
"I didn't taste even the tiniest bit of malice, of poison, on the contrary it
was quite OK. Do you want to call our friends and see what they think? Oh I
think Luffy already told me that he adores your food. Let's call Usopp and tell
him that your food is poison and see what he will....."
"Shut up!"
"Why? Let’s call him and ..."
"SHUT UP YOU BASTARD!"
"Why?"
"Because they don't need to know. Never!"
"Why?"
"No! They don't. They will not see me, not like this."
"Cook! You are an asshole!"
"Shut your face hole. You don't know what is like to not be able to let anyone
see you, to not be able to do what you like and TO NOT BE ABLE TO MOVE
FORWARD!"
cough cough
"You were getting better look what you are doing! Calm down, drink a little
tea. Come on breathe nice and easy, that's right."
"Shut up!"
"Cook you have no blood in your balls."
"What the fuck, you moron?"
"You are a coward cook!"
"Shut up! What the fuck do you know?"
"Let's make a deal then. Do you have the courage to do this with me?"
"What deal? What do you want?"
"Are you man enough cook?"
"Of course I am you bullhead. I’m in. What deal are you talking about?"
"You tell me your story, if I back up from you I'll be your slave for 10 days,
but if I don't, if I don’t get scared away or any other bad feeling you give me
10 days."
"Ten days of what?"
"Dating."
"No!"
"So I was right you are not man enough. A deal is a deal cook, take it and
prove I am wrong or take it back and prove me I was right."
"I will take it like a man but if I win you will forever disappear from my
face. Is that good enough for you?"
"Sure blondie, whatever. It won't happen."
"You say that now but wait for it."
"OK, I am done eating. Thank you for the food. Do you have some alcohol in the
house?"
"I think I have some wine."
"I said alcohol cook not juice. I have a feeling you will need it"
"Uncultured swine, yeah I think I have some whisky somewhere around here. Where
did I put it? Oh there it is."
"Old friend Jack. Get two glasses and come here cook."
"Stop bossing me around mosshead."
"Come sit on the couch with me!"
"I said..."
"I know what you said but you are about to have a breakdown and I am not
allowing this. I have my interests in this deal so let's get over with."
"How do you ...?"
"Less questions more tale telling. Come on out with it."
"OK. You asked for it. I am waiting forward to not seeing you ever again."
"Yeah, yeah. I am waiting."
"I don't even know where to start or what to tell you. Do you want just the
gross part or the extended version?"
"All of it. From the beginning till now."
"What now? I ..."
"All of it cook!" I demand the whole story!"
"You're in no place to demand!"
"Coook!"
"Fine, fine! well to go with the start I have to say I am orphan from the age
of 2 or maybe 3. I know I had a mother and I think sometimes I dream about her
singing to me.
It's a sweet little song, a lullaby maybe. But she was sick and died and
someone had to take me in. Nobody wanted a child so little and weak, it seems
that I don't just look like her but my body was the same, fragile. That's how I
ended up at the adoption house and then at a foster house. It was a big family,
three brothers and a sister.
They were also rich and had power so every once in a while a party would take
place at the house. Many would say that I was lucky but it wasn't that way.
When I started to grow up a little the boys I thought wanted to make me
stronger and started fighting with me. All three of them at once. I was daily
beaten and disgraced and I thought it was for my own good. I didn't tell their
father because I thought he will ground them and they were the only kids that
"played" with me. But because of that, of the bruises and scratches I was not
allowed at the parties any more, but I always sneaked in the kitchen. It was
like magic to me to see the cooks do their job.
So I grew up fighting for my life and thinking it was ok. Then one day I was
going to the kitchen late in the night and I heard him. It seems that their
father gave them money when they beat me and congratulated them for being
stronger. I didn't know what to do but it hurt. Not the beatings but the
thought that I was taken in that house for someone else's mockery. I cried that
night, like I never did before, I felt used and abandoned."
"Did you do something to them? Did you go to the police?"
"No. I let it slide. Maybe that was my problem. I was so afraid of being alone
that I preferred them, but this is the easiest part of the story. Some days
later an odd man came to the house to see me. He said that he wanted to adopt
me and he wanted to talk. He took me to the park and we talked. He told me that
he was a cook and that he saw what I was being put through and he thought it
was not ok, and he asked me if I wanted to be a cook and his son. I didn't
believe him at first, I hit him and told him that he is lying.
I asked him if he wanted me so that he could cook me." Sanji was laughing but
it was not a lough, but a desperate cry hide in the back of a chuckle.
"Go on! You can do this!"
"What can I say, he did the only thing that could shut me up then, he embraced
me. He took me in his big arms and told me that everything is going to be ok.
And then he asked me again.
He said something like... Sanji do you want to be my son, and one day one of
the best cooks? And while crying, yelling and being a brat I said yes. I wanted
that. And you know why? Because his embrace was so warm. So he got me back home
and said that he will be back for me in a few days, so I should be strong and
wait for him. And then he asked me again if I wanted to be his son and I said
yes again. And then he said something strange, he said that if I changed my
mind he wouldn't be able to do anything so I should be strong and say yes the
next time we meet. It seemed odd them but I didn't knew what awaited me. It
seems that the family wanted me as their toy from there forward also and they
didn't like that I was taken away so the first day after I was beaten more than
ever, I couldn't lift myself from the bed a day but when they asked me if I
wanted to stay with them I said no, so
I was beaten even worse, it hurt everywhere and I wanted the pain to go away, I
was dreaming that I was taken away by the men that wanted to be my father and I
was happy but when I woke up in the same house the disappointment hurt more
than the beatings."
"How old where you?"
"8 maybe 9. I don't remember it quite well."
"Did he took you? Did you keep your word?"
"Yes he took me but with a price. No, I didn't keep my word because the night
before he came to take me away my brothers acted more desperate, they didn't
want to lose their toy so they locked me up in a room and started yelling ugly
things at me while beating me, saying that their dad will kill the man that
wants to take me, that I will be responsible for his dead, and seeing that I
still wanted to leave, they did ... they ...." The blonde was hyperventilating.
He tried to talk again but he couldn’t.
"Sanji breathe! Slowly, that's right. Come here!"
"No, let me! Don't ..."
"Shhhhh. It's me Sanji! Let me hold you. Come Sanji, I will let you finish your
story, but I have to protect you!"
"You can't! Not any more .... "
"Yes, I can. Come! Let me do this for you!"
"No, let me finish. You will be engrossed and leave and I can't. Why did you
get so close? Is your head empty? Didn't you see that I am not what you think?"
"I will not embrace you but I will take your hand and look you right in your
eyes while you finish the story ok?"
"NO! Why would you do that?"
"To let you see my eyes and see that I will not leave, I will not abandon you
because you are not broken, you just forgot what it is like to be free. Now
come on give me your hand."
"You don't have to ...."
"I want to!"
"But ..."
"No but's. Give me your hand."
The blonde gave Zoro his hand and looked at him, really looked and he didn't
see pity or gross, not yet anyway. His hand was being touched, hold and
caressed and he wanted to have the courage to go in the big man's hug, to feel
that in all his body, but he couldn't because it was almost the end of the
story but the worst part was yet to come. He will be left alone again, he knew
it and he didn't want to have his hopes crushed again.
"Ok, do go on."
Sanji looked down, not knowing how to say the next part. He felt a warm hand on
his chin, slowly touching and pushing upwards at the same time.
"Let me look at you. I know it's hard but please let me hear it all."
"Ok, you really want to know? Very well moss head they fucked me all night
long, all three of them, they ripped my interiors apart and then again. They
threaten that even if the man will take me their father will find us and kill
him and I will be brought back and the same fate waited for me, but worse. They
told me that if I say no to the man they will not kill him and I will be left
alone." He didn't want to but he was crying, he was facing the marimo, talking
and crying. That was the moment Zoro jumped and embraced him, swinging him and
kissing his head. He was crying and yelling and he could not stop. It was the
first time he told someone this part of his life and it hurt worse than he
imagined. It was ripping his heart apart again and again. He had no heart or
soul because it was then shattered to pieces and thrown in the sea.
"Shhhh it's ok. They are gone! They are not here anymore! They can't hurt you
anymore."
"They are not gone, and they have power, more than you could imagine."
"Well then I won't let them."
"Could you let me go?"
"No, finish it here."
"Zoro, let me go. You will go too after that. "
"I won't so just finish it here. While you are in my arms nothing can happen,
do you hear me? Nothing! So now finish it, I know it was hard but I am here to
listen. What happened after?"
"I couldn't sit and I was bleeding, but what hurt me the most was that I had to
give up the warm embrace and the one who wanted to be my father, because he
didn't deserve to die.
So when the next day came I told everyone I didn't want to leave or talk to him
so he could go, I was not his son. He stood there at the door a few seconds
defeated, but I think then he had an idea because he said that he will not
leave until I say it in his face. So being bothered by the man, and careless I
believe, my foster father called me down. I was dressed up and their sister put
some make up on me. I looked at him and while crying I told him to go away
because he was bothering me and I didn't need him. A second I thought I fooled
him, but then he saw that blood that was pouring down my legs and pants. With a
horror look on his face my foster tried to snatch me but my old man was faster
he took me and ran, as fast as he could.
But he was not fast enough because he got shot in the leg. Do you understand
Zoro, to cover up themselves they would have killed the man that saved me and
maybe myself. But he ran, never letting me go. I think I fainted from the loss
of blood but I wake up a week later. My old man told me that they had to
operate me so they could stich me up, so I wouldn't die because I had my
interiors ripped apart. Zoro, I was their sand bag and their toilet. I was not
a human but a thing. And you know what the worst part is? The chance that I
will ever have a child is almost zero. I am not a man any more I am just ..."
"Shut the fuck up curly. Do you think that your old man saved you because you
were a thing?"
"NO, but he lost so much because of me."
"He didn't lose anything, he got you."
"You don't understand. He lost his leg. Because he ran the bullet made an
impossible to repair wound and he had to amputee a part of his leg. All because
of me."
"Did he ever tell you he regretted it?"
"No, never."
"Then don't you for a second dare to think little of yourself. You should be
proud and mighty that you are the son of a man that showed such greatness."
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